The Grass Doctor

you know you're over the hill when...?

you find yourself beginning to like accordion music lawn care has become a big highlight of your life your underwear creeps up on you...and you enjoy it you tune into the easy listening...on purpose you discover that your measurements are now small, medium, large...in that order you keep repeating yourself you start videotaping daytime game shows at cafeterias, you complain that the jello is too tough your new easy chair has more options than your car when you do the 'hokey pokey' you put your left hip out...and it stays out one of the throw pillows on your bed is a hot water bottle conversations with people your own age often turn into 'dueling ailments you keep repeating yourself it takes a couple of tries to get over a speed bump you’re on a TV game show and you decide to risk it all and go for the rocker you begin with every other sentence with, 'nowadays...' you run out of breath walking down a flight of stairs you look both ways before crossing the room you come to the conclusion that your worst enemy is gravity it takes you all night to do what you used to do all night you go to a garden party and your mainly interested in the garden you find your mouth making promises your body cant keep at parties you attend, ‘regularity’ is considered the topic of choice you start beating everyone else at trivia games you frequently find yourself telling people what a loaf of bread used to cost your back goes out more than you do you keep repeating yourself your childhood toys are now in a museum the clothes you’ve put away until they come back in style…come back in style all of your favorite movies are now revised in color the car that you bought brand new is now a very valuable antique you keep repeating yourself you find this list tasteless and insensitive

Public Comments

1. i find this funny. good laugh, thanks.
2. this is actually funny you should give lessons to some of the others.
3. ROFL!! That was hilarious!! thanks for the laugh!! he he...
4. LOL ...........ghee that's creepy isn't it ?..........LOL Thanks for sharing what getting old is about .......LOL. have a great week ahead : - )
5. YOU HAVE JUST WRITTEN MY LIFE.......LMAO
6. You know, they don't make jokes like they used to.. I find this list tasteless and insenstive. Nowadays, I just don't even bother reading jokes like this. You know, they don't make jokes like they used to. I would rather watch my movies on my vcr, but I can't remember where I left my vcr. Nowadays, they don't use vcrs. Oh well, maybe I will go to the museum and look at the toys. Wish I could find my vcr, all the old movies nowadays are made in color. A good movie and a ham sandwich.No, not ham, don't got no teeth.And nowadays, bread is so expensive. Why back in my days, a loaf of bread was only pennies. Nowadays, I just don't..